Can someone comment on my IELTS essay about stress in modern society?
Hi can someone review my writing and give it a band score if possible please?
In some societies, stress is now regarded as a major problem, and it is thought that people suffer from more stress than they did in the past.
However, others feel that the amount of stress people have today is exaggerated. They say that previous generations were under more pressure, but the idea of suffering from stress did not exist.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is undeniable that life has been upgraded remarkably for the last decades. People live an easier and more convenient life, yet are put under a lot of of pressure, which is now one of societies' biggest issues. However, some people argue that people today do not suffer from as much stress there was in the past when the concept of stress did not exist. I personally think that each generation deals with different kinds of pressure.
To begin with, people in modern societies tend to have numerous concerns whilst pursuing a high living standard. Employees are forced to work longer hours which results in a large amount of stress. Modern problems in finance, business, education and relationships usually put people in distress as well. Moreover, pollution caused by technology development has brought about a lot of serious diseases adding up to the endless list of today's concerns.
On the other hand, life of the previous generations was no less stressful. Without the help of technology, people in the past would have a lot of difficulties in doing everything on their own. Furthermore, as a result of war and ages of economic depression, poverty and diseases became the largest problems most people had to face. However, they were not likely to suffer from emotional instability from pressures. Common today's mental illness resulting from stress such as bipolar, eating disorder, social anxiety did not exist.
In conclusion, I think that the pressure that each generation is under aredistinct and incomparable. Nevertheless, unlike us, our ancestors had learned to manage it quite well.