IELTS Essay - Reliance on Cars

by James

I am taking IELTS this coming Saturday and in need of comments for my essay writing. Please help!

More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation.

Describe some of the problems the reliance on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution.


The increasing preference of using private vehicles as the means of transportation has caused an array of issues in many parts of the world. This essay will examine some potential impacts that this trend has on society and suggest some feasible solutions to ameliorate such backlash.

Predominantly, the rise of private vehicles has led to a number of issues which severely affect the quality of life of the people. To begin with, this trend is the root cause of traffic congestion in many metropolitan areas. More vehicles simply mean more traffic; road infrastructures are unable to keep up with such a sudden increase, thus lead to traffic jam. In addition, this malpractice is one of the contributing factors to pollution which affect us day by day. For example, the amount of burning fossil fuels significantly increase in order to fire up the engines of the millions vehicles. This translates that the severity of the pollution to the environment are gradually rising due to the amount of carbon dioxide being emitted to the atmosphere. Apart from this, noise pollution is also derived, though partially, from the increasing number of vehicles, and it tremendously degrades the quality of life people used to have before the advent of the development.

This, however, is not an impossible-to-solve issue if proper measures have been in place by the government and individuals. First of all, heavy tax can be introduced by the government in order to deter commuters from tempting to use their private means of transport, due to its high cost. At the same time, it also encourages people to start using public transportation. Individual people can also contribute to solving this matter. Carpooling, for example, is an effective solution to traffic congestion, and should well be adopted by many, so that, instead of one car for one person, a group of four or five and share if their destination is identical.

In conclusion, although increasing number of vehicles poses some serious issues to the society, it can still be easily resorted if everyone join hands and take some serious steps to solving it.

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Mar 03, 2017
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My comments in planning your main ideas
by: Anonymous

Hi,

I am not a tutor here, however, I hope my comments can help you in structuring your essays

Think of Main ideas and lead them to details.

PROBLEMS (suggested 2 -3 points)

Try to develop traffic congestion and how it affects individual/society.

This is how I will write:

"With the increasing number of cars on the road, it will aggravate the traffic condition in gridlocked cities, particularly during rush hours, which may leads to road accidents since there are drivers who will overtake cars recklessly".

The same for pollution, how does pollution affect us day to day? Gives example that it affects the environment and health.

Pollution causes global warming, causes breathing difficulties... Try to work your main ideas leading to effects.

SOLUTION (suggested 2-3)

Heavy tax on what? What kind of heavy tax? Tax on car purchase?

Do not start your first sentence on carpooling, for example ... start with a topic sentence:

"Individuals should participate in a carpooling service, which is a a private shared transportation for a number of people travelling to the same destination at the same time. Therefore,using this service will reduce the number of cars effectively, yet economically for daily commuters".

Conclusion:

Try to paraphrase and summarise the effects and solutions in one sentence. Then follow on to re-confirm your standpoint that it can be controlled if everyone does their part to proactively in minimise the use of cars and explore using other means of transportation.

Mar 14, 2017
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essay structure
by: AnonymousALEX

Commenting on the structure of the essay I would say you really did good work.The introduction is well paraphrased with a clear outline.Your body consists of two paragraphs, first one is clearly highlighting the problem and the second pointed out the possible solutions.Your conclusion has the summary of main points.To me, this is a good essay.

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