October 2017 - Practice Writing Essay Introductions

by IELTS buddy

Yesterday's exercise was about learning to write introductions for IELTS essays.


It was based on this recent essay question for IELTS:
Many jobs that used to be done in the home by hand can now be done by machine.

Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?


Your job was to write an introduction. Many of you posted them below - take a look as I've commented on some.

I have chosen this introduction as the best one:
A large number of household chores that were performed manually are now done with the help of machines. Overall, the merits eclipse the demerits of this development.

This has one clear sentence to introduce the topic, then a thesis statement that gives a clear opinion (there are more advantages than disadvantages.

Many of the introductions posted had the following problems:

- Too long
- Unclear thesis statement
- Too much detail
- No introductory sentence
- Too many grammar errors

You need to make your introduction simple and clear.

I advised you to look at this lesson to learn how to write an introduction:

IELTS Essay Introductions


So you should take a look if you are still having problems.



Comments for October 2017 - Practice Writing Essay Introductions

Click here to add your own comments

Dec 08, 2017
pls look the statement
by: Anonymous

Numerous works that have been performed at home manually are now being done by automated machines. However, I am of the opinion that this development outweighs the drawbacks furthermore, The pros and cons will be discussed in this essay and the conclusion will be drawn out.

Nov 29, 2017
From Tosin
by: Anonymous

Quite a number of house chores that were previously done manually are now being performed with the aid of machines. I think the pros of this development outweighs the cons.

Nov 21, 2017
Introduction
by: Anonymous

Advanced technology have contributed significantly to most household chores operated by machines as compared to this same job being tackled manually in recent years. I believe that this development do have greater benefits than drawbacks.

Nov 02, 2017
Intro
by: Anonymous

Nowadays machines are commonly used to do household chores, which were once done manually. Certainly there are much more benefits like saving time than drawbacks like dependency on others.

Oct 26, 2017
Introduction
by: Doris

Advance in technology has replaced most of domestic chores from manual to machine use.in general, the disadvantages are higher than the advantages

Oct 24, 2017
please check for correctness
by: Anonymous

most chores that where done manually before now have been replaced by machines. In my opinion, this innovations have more positive impacts than negative.

Oct 21, 2017
Introduction
by: M

A large number of household chores which were done manually are now being done with the help of machines. In my opinion, this development has more advantages than disadvantages.

Oct 20, 2017
Introduction
by: Blessing Ugo Emelue

A lot of household chores which were done manually are now automated.This essay shows that the benefits outweighs the demerits.

Oct 18, 2017
Essay Intro practise
by: Tolu Dada

Machines have taken over a large number of household chores. However, the benefits of this "trend or development", far outweigh the drawbacks.

Oct 18, 2017
Essay Intro
by: Kasper

As the technology advances so gradually on these days, most of our daily job would be taken by machine. In my opinion, there are fair to say that each one has pros and cons.

Oct 17, 2017
Please give me some suggestions.
by: Kaur

There is no denying to the fact that in present scenario, people have full of depend on technology due to which working are being done by individuals especially with the help of machines. Perhaps, there are myriad merits rather than demerit. I intend to hashout appropriate points in upcoming paragraphs.

Oct 17, 2017
genreal
by: k


in the modern era,mostly the proformance of household chores can done work with the help machine rather than hand.while these advancement has merits can overweight the disadvantages.

Oct 17, 2017

by: Anonymous

A large number of household chores that were performed manually are now done with the help of machines. Overall, the merits eclipse demerits of this development

in the modern era,mostly the proformance of household chores done work with the help machine rather than hand.while these advancement has merits can overweight the disadvantages.

Oct 17, 2017
essay introduction
by: Anonymous

The advent of machines being used for several household chores which were being done manually before has more advantages than disadvantages.

Oct 16, 2017
My Introduction.
by: Anonymous

In the past, household chores are done manually. But with the advent of technology, these chores are done even better within a twinkle of an eye, and the merits out way the demerits.

Oct 15, 2017
introduction
by: Anonymous

The advancement in technology has revolutionized the world with machines able to help mankind. To save time and energy, consumed in household chores, manual working replaced by machines. Clearly, it surpass the disadvantages to enormous advantages.

Oct 15, 2017
Many jobs that used to be done in the home by hand can now be done by machine. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?
by: Anonymous

Many jobs that used to be done in the home by hand can now be done by machine.

Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

Several domestic jobs that hitherto were done manually are now being executed electronically. In my opinion the merits in favour of this trend far exceeds the drawbacks.

Oct 15, 2017
Introduction
by: Adeyinka

There is no doubt that the introduction of technology into the human culture has evolved his experience. While some would argue that the disadvantages of technology is far more than the advantages, others would take a divergent opinion arguing in favor of technology over manual labour. However i am of the unflinching opinion that technology has outweighed the manual mode of labour in all ramifications.

Oct 14, 2017
Many jobs that used to be done in the home by hand can now be done by machine. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages
by: Prosil

Many of the domestic chores that hitherto were manually done are currently been executed with the aid of machines. The numerous advantages of this recent development outweigh its few demerits and thus is a welcome development.

A couple of very noticeable grammar errors, but otherwise ok.

Oct 14, 2017
introduction
by: Anonymous

Although most household cores have done by manually at home, nowadays machines are used instead.overall, this trend outweighs drawbacks than positive outputs.

The idea is right but unfortunately there are grammar problems.

Oct 14, 2017
Introduction
by: Anonymous

Although most employments related with hand activities, nowadays machines are used instead.This trend outweighs drawbacks than positive outputs.

The idea is right but unfortunately there are grammar problems.

Oct 13, 2017
Introduction
by: Anonymous

Through history, many things have changed and it’s not an exception what we do in the home. Nowadays we have a lot of advanced devices that we can use for help to do some tasks at home.

There is no thesis statement.

Oct 13, 2017
Introduction
by: Tian

In recent years, the general public have experience more unwind and easier than before when they are doing the exhausted housework. As that the result of the innovation about electronic technology. From my perspective, I definitely agree with that this phenomena have upsides over the downsides. This essay will endeavor to prove my opinion by several reasons as bellow.

A bit confusing because of grammar errors. Also, the thesis should be one sentence and it should appear last. You have another sentence after it.

Oct 13, 2017
house hold chores done with hand are now done with machine.
by: Anonymous

Most of the house hold chores done manually are now done with the aid of machine. In my own view, the benefits outweighs the disadvantages.

Good

Oct 13, 2017
Introduction
by: Lilly

Nowadays, most household tasks that were manually completed can now be accomplished with the aid of automated technology. Overall, it is obvious that privileges received from using machines definitely outweighs the drawbacks.

A good introduction though 'privileges' is probably not the right word.

Oct 12, 2017
Introduction
by: Anonymous

A number of household chores can now be done with the aid of machines. Though there are disadvantages, I believe the positive effects of this far outweighs them.

Good

Oct 12, 2017
Many jobs that used to be done in the home by hand can now be done by machine. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?
by: FRANCISCAMARIO

Numerous and uncountable household chores usually done manually are in recent times done mechanically and without stress. In my personal assessment,this technological advancement has more merits than damaging effect.

That's better. An introduction can be longer, but only if you have the time to do it.

Oct 12, 2017
Many jobs that used to be done in the home by hand can now be done by machine. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?
by: FRANCISCAMARIO

Advancement in technology occurring in our 21st century is an unnoticeable event. man has evolved from depicting images of mammoths on the walls of caves to making aesthetic drawing while surfing the internet for more enticing scenery with his laptop without leaving his favorite office chair. However individuals wonder if chores and work that people do manually and which are now carried out mechanically have increasing merits than damaging effect. in my own opinion,technology has taken us positively,beyond what the human mind could conceive years back,and this has only made living fun instead of the mirage people call life instead of "surviving".

It's much too long and there is no clear thesis statement.

Oct 12, 2017
England correctp
by: Anonymous

The demand for household use of washing machine and other household technology have significantly increased when compared to hand washing practices. This is as a result of increased demand for family engagements and job resulting to reduced free time at home in washing and drying our household cloths. I strongly concur with this argument that every household should afford the recent technology to ease the stress of over labour and household chores which can significantly affecting most populace.

Too much detail. There needs to be a clear and simpler introductory sentence and thesis statement.

Oct 12, 2017
Ielts Aspirant
by: Anonymous

Nowadays, manually performed domestic work are now performed with the help of machines. In my perspective, the drawback of this development are eclipsed by its benefits. Support of this opinion will be presented with elaborations in the succeeding paragraphs of this essay, followed by a conclusion.

The last sentence shouldn't be there.

Oct 12, 2017
Introduction
by: Nikky

The advancement in technology in modern times which resulted in the usage of various machines to accomplish different tasks hitherto done manually has made life more comfortable to mankind.

This should be split into two sentences.

Oct 12, 2017
Introduction
by: Sam At

Nowadays, because of modern advance in technology some works can replace by machine. The household's work such as washing cloths, washing dishes, cleaning the floor, and so forth mostly have to do by hand. To reduce the time to work in household's work we can use the machine. We can save more time and we can do the other work in the same time when we do the household's work with machine.

Too long and there is no thesis / opinion.

Oct 12, 2017
When is it too much?
by: Anonymous

Technology and technological advancements play a huge role in society, so much so that it is naive to suggest that it will not play an even greater role in the foreseeable future. These myriad advancements are perhaps most evident in the household. In fact, no average home in today's world is considered complete without a washing machine/dryer, a computer, and some would argue an in-home, wireless security system linked to the internet. I believe that for every advantage that technology brings us, there are as many drawbacks or disadvantages to our increasing dependence upon it.

A bit long for an IELTS essay introduction.

Oct 12, 2017
introduction
by: Terry

The argument over whether household chores done by a person or by a machine is the most efficent way has not been settle yet. However, i would definately agree that manually proforming house work outways the use of autotmated machines.

This would have been ok, but there are too many spelling errors.

Oct 12, 2017
Essay introduction
by: Anonymous

Most of the domestic activities formerly carried out by humans are now been achieved by using automated devises. How effective is this improvement checking both the benefits and pitfall.

The use of automated devises at home has a lot of advantages, for instance, Vacuum cleaner that is been used for cleaning the dirty at home this makes the job to be very easy and fast.
However,some person(s) believed that doing your house shores manually is quite interesting and makes them more comfortable and satisfactory.

The advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages in the sense that, its very fast, ease of stress etc. Although, it is expensive because it involves money compare to the use of hand.

Not sure what this is. An introduction should be a few sentences in one paragraph.

Oct 12, 2017
Introduction
by: pankaj

Technology has bestowed upon us many inventions that has reduced the burden of doing house chores which were done by hands in the past. Although it has reduced the physical movement of people, but the benefits of using gadgets for performing day-to-day activities in house has out weighs its negative aspects. In this essay, I will discuss some of the positive traits of using machines in house work.

Confusing as it appears to have two thesis statements.

Oct 12, 2017
Essay introduction
by: Anonymous

It is a common knowledge that nowadays household chores have been almost totally automated with all these iRobots and washing machines. Despite the fact that some people feel relief with new opportunities, others find it quite frustrating due to the fact that we are losing our essential skill as well as possibilities to engage in some physical activities.

This will be ok, as long as a firm opinion is given in the conclusion as to whether there are more advantages or disadvantages.

Oct 12, 2017
The introdiction writing.
by: Anonymous

It is very true that most of the hand works are being done by machines,however I can generally say the advantages outweighs the disadvantages.I say so because in this busy era one will hardly get time to do the household chores because of some busy schedules.After work one would also want to help the children with homeworks,so it is very convinient to have some machines to help you like the dish washing machine.This will help a lot in time management.

In the other hand the machines will consume a lot of electricity thus causing some large elctrical bills in the house and also in a while the machines will need some services ,so this will increase the cost of your expenditure.

This looks like a body paragraph, not an introduction.

Oct 12, 2017
Introduction
by: Ayodeji

Quite a number of household tasks previously carried out by humans are being automated these days.The benefits have brought about significant improvement in quality of life.

Thesis does not make it clear as to whether disadvantages are going to be discussed as well.

Oct 12, 2017
ESSAY INTRO
by: Anonymous

Over the years, our society has developed many technologies that have great contribution to human activities. For an instance, activities that are done in our home can now be performed by machines. I believe that this development has significant effect in our daily lives. In this essay advantages of modern development will be discussed.

An opinion has not been given as to whether there are more benefits or drawbacks.

Oct 12, 2017
Technology - A boon or bane
by: Anonymous

Technology is a boon to people as it is fast, accurate and easy to perform tasks on a daily basis. But people should also remember its disadvantages as it may reduce the quality of a task. Hence people should use equipment's for household choirs if its really necessary.

The thesis does not appear connected to the question as to whether there are more benefits or drawbacks.

Oct 12, 2017
Household work
by: Shelly

Although many would argue that automation of household chores has made our lives easy, I believe this lack of physical activity is harmful for out health.

An ok thesis statement, but it needs an opening sentence to introduce the topic.

Oct 11, 2017
Introductions
by: Anonymous

A number of job today is increase and the labor needs are to be identify by human using or machine. By the world increase labor and job, machine used a vital part for this moment.

Confusing.

Oct 11, 2017
Introduction
by: Anonymous

At present, an increasing amount of work manually done at home is instead undertaken through the use of machines. Like everything in the world, it has its benefits as well as its drawbacks.

This is ok, as long as in the essay and conclusion it is made clear whether there are more benefits or drawbacks.

Oct 11, 2017
machine work more convenient
by: Anonymous

An increasing number of jobs are being done by mechanical equipment instead of hand. To my perception, I believe that this is a positive development because human labor is being expensive day by day and machine work is more convenient.

This is ok. An introductory sentence, and then a thesis saying that there are more benefits.

Oct 11, 2017
Intro
by: Rupinder

Nowadays various type of work has been done by machines rather than manual work since the invention of new technical machines. This essay will cast light advantages and disadvantages of this significant development.

Thesis statement a bit confusing as 'cast light' is not appropriate and not used correctly. It would be better just to say if there are more benefits or drawbacks.

Oct 11, 2017
Intro
by: Anonymous

The technology development has changed the human`s life significantly. Today some work, that is used to do by men, can be done more efficiently and faster by machine. That is a topic for discussion because there are several benefits and drawbacks which I am going to consider in this essay.

Better to say upfront if there are more benefits or drawbacks.

Oct 11, 2017
Introduction
by: Anonymous

Technology development allow people to do many jobs that were done by hand to be done by machine. Nowadays, many activities are carried out by machine so that peforgat or do not know how to do other jobs waiting for machine. According to me, this development have more disadvantages than advantages.

A bit confusing because of grammar errors.

Oct 11, 2017
Introduction
by: Anonymous

A large number of household chores that were performed manually are now done with the help of machines. Overall, the merits eclipse the demerits of this development.

A good introduction. A sentence to introduce the topic, then a thesis statement that gives a clear opinion.

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