Changes in Society Essays

by Arvind Sharma


Hello,

My name is Arvind Sharma. I am from India and preparing for IELTS without taking any coaching.

Recently, I have come across to this web site which I have found quite useful. I have written a Changes in Society Essay which needs to be checked for marking criteria.

Here is the essay question and answer:-



Some people think that only the government can make significant changes in society, while others think that individuals can have a lot of influence.

What is your opinion?


In today’s world, making substantial changes in society has always been a major concern for every nation. It is believed that these changes can be made only by the government, whereas others argue that an individual can make a difference and eventually change the society. This essay will address both sides of this argument and finally reach to a conclusion with an opinion.

On the one hand, It is considered that government of every nation can make important changes in society by enforcing the law and conducting the awareness seminars. To put this in another way, people’s safety can only be ensured if the government enforces law and order in society. For instance, according to a social experiment, safety is a crucial matter in a society which is being expected by people from the ruling administration. Moreover, government should take effective steps in order to conduct the awareness seminars which will help people to aware and understand the acute problems of a society. Thus, it is clear that government plays a vital role in making a significant difference between a better and worse society.

On the other hand, Despite government aid, individuals should understand the responsibilities towards the betterment of a society. Firstly, people can change the society by actively participating in the social activities. For example, being social activists, they will understand and resolve the critical issues of the society which cannot be felt without being socialist. Secondly, youngsters should be encouraged to attain a higher education and set an example in a society for others who have been demoralized in their life. Finally, a person should be helpful and kind to others and especially to those who are needy. Therefore, it has been proven that every individual has a potential to change the society by simply encouraging and motivating themselves.

In conclusion, after discussing the both sides of an argument, in my opinion, although it should be the prime responsibility of the government in making important changes in a society, the individuals should also be matured and responsible in order to help society emerging from worse conditions and to make it a better place.



Comments for Changes in Society Essays

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May 17, 2016
Average essay
by: A maybe-lucky 8.0 writer

Hello there.

Although it's a good essay, I truly recommend you to fix these mistakes:

1. At the introduction, you should ALWAYS point out your point of view of the problem at the end of the 1st par. You can "strongly agree", "partly advocate" with the idea. As I said, be straightforward.

2. Generally, you have a major mistake which will deprive you from getting a high score: No specific examples. I can give you some hints: goverment can make changes: compare between US government and Chinese to show the impact of their policies onto the environment, lifestyle, technology ... Your choice. Individual: take the young boy in Hong Kong who is fighting for democracy. ALWAYS: Be specific.

3. There are some minor mistake, like the first idea in 2nd par is confusing (government enforced law to keep the society safe from harm). Well, I think I shouldn't fix your main idea but let you read again and reconsider.

So, "no pain, no gain". Keep up the good work.
Cheers.

May 19, 2016
Thanks for giving an advice
by: Anonymous

Thanks a lot for marking my mistakes which I made during writing an essay. I really appreciate that you have paid attention to it and spent your time to mark the mistakes. I will keep your advice in my mind whenever I will write an essay. I will be posting a new essay and looking forward having some comments on it.

Sep 30, 2016
BUDDY
by: Sekhar44#

I want to know how can i improve my writing skills

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Living Alone

by Hayder Ahmed
(Leeds, UK)

In recent times, many people are making the decision to live alone.

What are the causes of this?

Does it have positive or negatives effects on society?


Recently, the number of people who live alone is increasing in the world. Many people want to live far away from their families. There are many reasons for this and it is agreed that this have a negative aspects on the society. Analysing both the reasons of living alone as well as drawbacks of this on the community will show this.

Firstly, there are many reasons of why people decide to be alone and leave their families. One of the reasons is lack of relationship among members of family leads to a person to live alone. For example, when a problem occurs between two persons, who have a weak relationship, in a family. Consequently, these persons leave their families and live far away. Another reason is that many people want to be independent. For instance, recently many youngers work and make many that help them to live independent and then get marriage. Thus this makes it clear why some people decide to live far away from their families.

Secondly, as a number of people who want to live alone increase, this have a negative effects on the society. One of the effects is the social activities in the community decrease and the cooperation becomes weak. For example, the old people do not obtain a help when the relationship among members of society is weak. Another effect is young people when be alone may be attractive by criminals and they do crimes in the society because they do not receive advices from their parents. From this it becomes quiet evident that living alone have many drawbacks on the society.

In summary, many reasons make people live alone and this has many negative aspects on the community. After analysing the reasons and negative effects of this, it is predicted that disadvantages of this subject much more than
advantages.

(300 words)

*****


Comments can be posted below for this change in society essay about living alone.

Comments for Living Alone

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Mar 25, 2015
vocab rectification
by: Azam

According to me

For instance, recently many "youngsters" work and make "a lot" that "enable" them to live "independently" and then get "married".

Mar 25, 2015
scoring essay on the causes and effects of living alone
by: Anonymous

Thank you Azam for your comment.

Please could you score this essay?

Mar 28, 2015
my views on this causes and effects of living alone essay
by: Teresa Fernandez

The essay is good, but be careful of mistakes like 'get marriage'. The correct way to write is ''get married.''

In the same way there are mistakes here and there. However' the essays format, the setting, the idea are good and focussed.

I teach Ielts in Cochin, Kerala, India. (mob: 9995071609)0

Apr 01, 2015
correction for essay on the causes and effects of living alone
by: Anonymous

First, in the second paragraph, i noticed a mistake in spelling, the paraphrase should be "make money"
instead of make many.

Secondly, i think the topic was vital and the writer was quite good in organising his thoughts and analysing the problem and its reasons.

Jul 23, 2015
same topic for my july ielts exam.
by: ben

I started by saying that everybody had the ability to make choice in life. Even God said he had placed before us life or death, we are to make our choice.

In my opinion living alone has a negative impact on the development of the the country. I said that people who live alone may not be able to socialize well and therefore not be able to make significant contributions to the development of their country. I gave an example of bill gates who through his ideas made necessary contributions to the IT world through micro soft because he was not living alone but was good at socializing.

please help. I need to know if i had a point or i was out of point.

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Stress in Modern Society

by Laura

Hi can someone review my writing for this change in society essay and give it a band score if possible please?

In some societies, stress is now regarded as a major problem, and it is thought that people suffer from more stress than they did in the past.

However, others feel that the amount of stress people have today is exaggerated. They say that previous generations were under more pressure, but the idea of suffering from stress did not exist.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


It is undeniable that life has been upgraded remarkably for the last decades. People live an easier and more convenient life, yet are put under a lot of of pressure, which is now one of societies' biggest issues. However, some people argue that people today do not suffer from as much stress there was in the past when the concept of stress did not exist. I personally think that each generation deals with different kinds of pressure.

To begin with, people in modern societies tend to have numerous concerns whilst pursuing a high living standard. Employees are forced to work longer hours which results in a large amount of stress. Modern problems in finance, business, education and relationships usually put people in distress as well. Moreover, pollution caused by technology development has brought about a lot of serious diseases adding up to the endless list of today's concerns.

On the other hand, life of the previous generations was no less stressful. Without the help of technology, people in the past would have a lot of difficulties in doing everything on their own. Furthermore, as a result of war and ages of economic depression, poverty and diseases became the largest problems most people had to face. However, they were not likely to suffer from emotional instability from pressures. Common today's mental illness resulting from stress such as bipolar, eating disorder, social anxiety did not exist.

In conclusion, I think that the pressure that each generation is under aredistinct and incomparable. Nevertheless, unlike us, our ancestors had learned to manage it quite well.

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Jun 30, 2014
8 bands
by: Anonymous

great. i couldnt find a mistake. keep it up

Aug 04, 2014
NICELY PORTRAYED
by: Anonymous

I THINK YOU WERE GOOD OVERALL, BUT THERE CAN BE ALOT OF ISSUES THAT CAN BE EXPLAINED IN OUR DAILY LIFE TOO.
SO THAT YOU CAN CONVEY YOUR MESSAGES WITH EASE.

Sep 15, 2015
Correction
by: Anonymous

Hi!

I've taken the liberty of correcting your essay. Unfortunately there is no way to highlight the mistakes in red, so you'll have to read and compare to what you have written.

However, some people argue that people today do not suffer from as much stress as they did in the past when the concept of stress did not exist

To begin with, people in modern societies tend to have numerous concerns whilst pursuing a high standard of living

Employees are forced to work longer hours, which results in a large amount of stress

Common today's mental illnesses, resulting from stress such as bipolarity, eating disorder, social anxiety did not exist.


Sep 05, 2016
4/5
by: Anonymous

a pretty good essay

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Changing Hobbies and Interests

by abdur rahim kutubi
(Bangladesh)

Popular hobbies and interests change over time and are more a reflection of trends and fashions than an indication of what individuals really want to do in their spare time.

To what extend do you agree or disagree?


From dawn of the civilization, people have been choosing and changing their leisure time activities which have effect on combination of socio economic development tendency and styles rather than individual contribution. Although it is evident that modern society convinces the people providing popular ideas which have great interest, personal choice in selecting pastime activities should be given priority.

It is true that over the decade, in modern technology computers as a first priority are conquering the people’s mind to be leisure activity that is being azure in the society. The internet shopping, for example, is gaining popularity in Bangladesh day after day. To expedite the overall cultural development, such type of habits makes people more influenced than ever before. Moreover, watching satellite TV helps people to adopt which spare time functions can bring enriched our society ongoing fashionable style. People also accept the most favorable outfits that make them to dream in life. It is undeniable that popular cultural always dominates people’s life to pass their time with enjoy and entertainment. Because of available popular source of pastime activities, people are compelled to choose more rather than individual’s like.

On the other hand, if the modern science engulfs our personal taste, then our individual liking will be abolished. In this case, identity of a person might not be exposed and creativity is not supposed to be expected as per demand of society. Of course, to thrive the society, we should heed to blossom the innovation of individual works. Basically, different people have different types of choices that depend on their view. If it is given an opportunity to select the hobby, he/she will be able to provide the new discovery through individual liking.

In recapitulation, I am agreed that with the advancement of society, we have some influence of spare time activities rather than a person’s will. So, we cannot avoid the ongoing world.

Please comment on my hobbies and Interests Changing Over Time essay

Comments for Changing Hobbies and Interests

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Mar 03, 2015
Commandable
by: Anonymous

I am not very much sure of conclusion part !! But I found difficulty understanding the question a bit!!

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Role of Libraries in Modern Society

by eun
(korea)


Some people consider public libraries to be unnecessary due to the availability of information on the Internet. Others, however, believe that libraries can still play an important role in society.

Discuss both views and give your opinion.


No one would deny that with the high accessibility of the Internet, libraries have been given less importance in society, compared to the past. While some people believe that the public libraries are no longer essential because of the Internet, I believe that libraries still make a positive contribution in our societies.

On the one hand, the Internet enables the users to obtain a wide range of information regardless of their locations. People would not travel to a local library in order to read books or any other reading materials as they have access to the information via the web research. For example, if an individual inserts few keywords on the websites, he will be given a rich variety of the related information from all over the world within a minute. Therefore, using the Internet for acquiring information may cause a situation where visiting libraries seem to have no necessity for the Internet users.

Nevertheless, I do believe that the existence of libraries in society should not be able to regard as pointless. A library is much more than a means of distribution of the information; it also has a vital role in a whole community through different sorts of workshops. Those arranged classes may become a key to tackling some social problems. To take Denmark as example, the public libraries have held several community activities, such as computer teaching sessions for the old to lessen the generation gap in using technology devices and the recruitment resources centre for job-seekers to curtail unemployment rates. By having libraries, people will continuously acquire a variety of information, which benefits the society.

To recapitulate, even though it is preferable for the public to use the Internet for the rapid acquisition of information instead of libraries, I believe that libraries possess more benefits not only for users but also for a society.

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Nov 16, 2016
Libraries
by: Anonymous

Libraries play a very important role in our in our life libraries help us to learn more information.:-)

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Alternative Medicine

by Hayder Ahmed
(Leeds, UK)

Currently there is a trend towards the use of alternative forms of medicine. However, at best these methods are ineffective, and at worst they may be dangerous.

To what extent do you agree with this statement?


Traditionally, people in the past used alternative medicine for a long time. Nowadays, many people are still using this medicine to treat a lot of diseases. It is agreed that alternative medicine is not useful and sometime dangerous. Analysing both invalidity of alternative medicine to treat many illnesses as well as the dangerous of drugs in this medicine will show this.

Firstly, alternative medicine does not use techniques and facilities that are important to treat a lot of illnesses as modern medicine do. For example, many diseases require surgery operations to succeed by using many technical devices such as sonar and X-Ray that help doctors to perform these operations in a best way. Therefore, alternative medicine is not the best to process many illnesses. Thus this makes it clear why alternative medicine is not effective and useless.

Secondly, drugs in alternative medicine do not tested scientifically to specify if it is dangerous or not. For instance, alternative medicine uses plants to produce drugs and these plants may be contain toxic materials or any other dangerous substances. So, when human uses these drugs that are harmful, the state of person may be worse and sometime lead to death. From this it becomes quite evident that alternative medicine may be dangerous and harmful.

In summary, alternative medicine has many drawbacks such as useless and sometime very dangerous. Thus, it is clear why the idea of using alternative medicine is helpful to treat many diseases cannot be supported. After analysing this subject, it is predicted that negative aspects of using alternative medicine much more than positive ones and the government should have full control of using alternative medicine.

(275 words)

***


Please comment on my Changes in Society Essay about Alternative Medicine. Thanks.

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Mar 25, 2015
Very good essay
by: Samir

Very good essay, I should give you 5, but I am trying to keep you practicing because you never know what may occur in IELTS.

However, you have two grammatical mistakes:

>>drugs in alternative medicine do not tested

Drugs ... are not tested

>> plants may be contain toxic materials

Plants may contain....


Mar 26, 2015
Samir - Alternative Medicine Essay
by: Anonymous

Thank you Samir for your comments.

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People Living Longer

by Binod
(Melbourne)

People nowadays live longer than they used to.

What caused this situation?

Is it a negative or positive development?


Time is running and we are keeping our pace so as to chase it but in doing so our style of living life has also been changing from traditional and conventional to modern sophisticated luxurious form. As a result, we are consuming healthier balanced diet and using less physical force in performing jobs which is soaring our life expectancy a bit longer than we used to live in the past. By contrast, it is highly contentious as some are in favor of this ideas and others are antagonistic to this.

To begin with potential merits, as we are stepping on this modern era of world which is driven by advanced form of technologies and lots of other advancement everybody has strong proclivity for living life with fullest use of these development. Thus, we are avoiding muscle demanding work but intensively using machinery aides. Similarly, our way of nutrition intake has been changed to proper form and in scheduled way. From dusk to dawn we are so prudent and wise in assimilating balanced diet, keeping body fit by visiting gymnasium, saving loss of calories and time by using automobiles for transportation etc. Moreover, most of people nowadays are well educated and conscious of their own health. Therefore, this is putting our life span bit longer compared to the past which I partially believe is advantageous to us.I see two fundamental reasoning in favor of this.Firstly, most of us want to live longer to taste the advancement of future world and share our expertise to upcoming generation.Secondly, all families want to live their beloved for longer time. To exemplify, this is more evident in hospital where we can always observe that the family of patient whose life is almost at end is yelling for bit longer life. To illustrate more, a early demise of veteran professional is great loss for this world as it will cost much penny to raise another individual to bring up to this professional level.

On the other hand,others in against with living longer life might argue that this is absolutely not good as it might be a problem for maintaining ecosystem to this Earth and leads to unbalanced population of flora and fauna. Furthermore,it is highly pejorative to live longer because people will have to fight for opportunities such as jobs,food and shelters as well as transportation as many octogenarian people still occupy the position which is anticipated to be filled by new comers in this Earth. Therefore,according to Charles Darwin-'Struggle for existence' will be observed which in turn result deleterious effect like kidnapping, extortion and vandalism for their survival. Besides this, weaker will always remain weaker and similarly does the richer. Moreover, increasing population will have to deforest jungle in order to build their home and for making food which will slowly put the Earth deficit in resources.Consequently, extreme scarce in trees will stop precipitation level but increase in greenhouse gases like CO2 which is very harmful in depleting ozone layer thus by bringing global increment in temperature.

To conclude, though people want to live longer its disadvantages easily outweighs advantages. Therefore, I wholeheartedly suggest it is not good idea as we have to give equal opportunities to upcoming generation and play parental role towards them and take care of our ever best natural abode-The Earth.

***


Please comment on my Changes in Society Essay about living longer. Thanks.

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Apr 10, 2014
Longetivity Essay
by: IELTS buddy

You have some good grammar, ideas and vocabulary in the essay.

However, the main issue I would have with this essay is the length - did you write it in 40 minutes??

Jul 11, 2015
very lengthy
by: Anonymous

Nicely written but essay was bit of over exerted sort of. Felt as if writer was going off the track sometimes. Otherwise nice effort.

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Changing Society Essays

by Mohsin Hassan Khan
(Quetta, Pakistan)

Some people think that only governments can make significant changes in society, while others think that individuals can have a lot of influence.

What is your opinion?


Alterations in the society can be brought by government and sometimes by individuals too, think people. However, it is true that society is made by every single person but controlled by government. Although individuals can make changes but the ideas and will of every person differ; therefore government not only has to spread the awareness among people but it also has to impose new laws, which everyone has to follow or is compelled to follow, in order to make society an excellent place to inhabit.

Some people like to invest their own belongings to make their society better while some are reluctant just because they think the government should fulfill their needs particularly the basic ones. For instance, two persons living in a same street: one throws the garbage in the dustbin which he himself has planted outside his home. Other throws his garbage on the road of the same street and thinks that any government servant will come and clean the street. So, by these two opposite actions the society cannot be cleaned because the hard work of one person will go in vein just because of the action on another person.

Government has the power to make people aware of things which harm and which are beneficial for the society. For example, government should spread the awareness through things like media and home to home surveys. This will reduce the negatives in society and increase the positives.

In addition to the government's range of authority, government can introduce new laws and can bound people to follow them. Like, if one's idea or will of benefiting society does not match another's idea then it does not matter because government wants them to follow what it wants them to follow. By doing this, opposition of one another will vanish.

To conclude, despite individuals' clash in changing society, the government can make them do the same work which would be constructive for the sovereignty. I believe if citizens abide the laws which are promulgated my government then the society will be as clean as a whistle.

written By: "M.H.KHAN."
fb/twitter/instagram,etc: "mhkhanbangash"

***


What do you think about this essay on Governments and Individuals Changing Society?

Help this student to improve their score by commenting below.

Comments for Changing Society Essays

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Jan 04, 2016
checked
by: Anonymous

I don't get it.....please make your points clear.

Jun 13, 2016
c
by: Anonymous

this is not a good essay bro, especially the example

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The Use of Public Parks Essay

by Arvind Sharma

Although many people value their public parks, this space could be better used for other purposes such as residential areas for the ever growing population or to develop business and boost economies.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?


Parks are important to our life; they give us clean and fresh air and gives us an area of jogging, walking and playing. It is argued by many that park space can be used for residential purposes as there is a need of space due to the growing population in our societies. I believe, not only park provides relaxation and greenery; it also takes us close to nature which is lacking due to ever-growing increase of concrete buildings.

Nevertheless, after hard work everyone needs relaxation and rest which most of the times is fulfilled by parks. The relaxing environment of park gives a soothing experience for anyone who is looking for tranquillity. For instance, I go to office every day and after returning I sit and relax in the park to cool down my mind from the stress which I took from my office ( Which is usually taken from my office). Moreover, parks provide shade in summers and can be used for basking in winters. People enjoy sitting under a tree or bushes which keeps them out from the hot sunshine in summer seasons. Similarly, in winters, people love to sit in the park to bask and to get rid of the cold waves.

However, due to the large area acquired by the park and growing demand for residential buildings there is a need to contemplate on the need of parks. It has been evident in the past that demolishing of parks and making space for the buildings is sufficing the need of residential space. For instance, urbanisation is increasing day by day and covering large which was earlier acquired for the parks. Therefore, it is discernible that space can be made out from these parks for residential areas.

In conclusion, I believe, parks are a useful part of our life, they should be demolished to make space for residential colonies. Not only they bring us close to nature, they also provide necessary oxygen and greenery which is lacking these days in the urban areas full of concrete buildings.

***


Please feedback on my essay about public parks.

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May 31, 2016
Fine writing
by: Anonymous

Hello,

Firstly, be extra careful with your grammar. There are plenty of mistakes which can hinder you from getting a high score.

Secondly, your 3rd paragraph is confusing. Do you fully support, or partly concur with the idea of keeping those parks?

Finally, you should give more effort to write the conclusion. Don't just restate like that.

Anyway, it is a good essay, though.

Jun 04, 2016
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the essay
by: Anonymous

Hello,

I really appreciate that you have read my essay and checked where I made the mistakes. You are right on the point that the 3rd paragraph seems to be ambivalent. I think that it should have been mentioned in the introduction whether I am going to write in the favor of having parks or against. I think that in the 3rd paragraph idea should have been extended.

I am bit confused about the task achievement. What if I do not write anything about the demolishing of the parks for making the room for others or for business, will this fulfill the task achievement?

Jun 07, 2016
The Use of Public Parks Essay
by: IELTS buddy

You are better to make sure you do address any points that are raised in the question as it could be seen to not be fully answering the question (thus getting a lower score for task achievement) if you do not.

So yes I would write about developing business and boosting economies.

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Essay on the Impacts of Shopping

by Vishav
(Punjab)

I scored 6 in my writing, but I need minimum 7 band. Please check my essay, it will be very helpful for me.

Shopping is becoming more and more popular as a leisure activity. However, some people feel that this has both positive and negative effects.

Why is shopping so popular?

What effects does its increase in popularity have on individuals and on society?


In free time, people spend most of the time in purchasing something in showrooms or markets. Although, every person have different opinion on shopping and some believe that shopping works as a stress buster and it helps in keeping us up-to-date in market. But, I believe shopping leads to a problem because people buy lot more Unnecessary things and till the end they stuck in financial problems.

On the one hand, Shopping is very much famous in terms of passing time. There are many reasons behind this, like weather conditions in these days are very unpredictable. So, people spend most of the time in window shopping in multi-brand malls where air conditions works for 24 by 7 in case of summers and heaters in season of winters. In recent research,it was found that every weekend cloths outlets are earning 5 times more than weekdays.

On the other hand, increment in popularity of shopping has effected tragically to the many people and leads to weaken the social life of individuals. Earlier people used to meet each other in free time; So, that time they were socially very much active. But, now people spend time in purchasing things on their credit cards which turns out to be another problem for them. According to an article of New York times, 20% of suicide cases were due to financial crises which arisen because of loans taken for person needs.

In conclusion, I believe we should not spend our precious time into shopping and instead of that an individual can go out for travel and spend less time and money in shopping. In this way, people will be able to make better social life yet money will spent in traveling but it will also release stress and motivate to work more and earn.

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Jun 26, 2017
Essay on the Impacts of Shopping
by: Anonymous

Hi

You have some problems with sentence structure and tenses like have or will have. You need to practice this to achieve a better IELTS score. Good luck

Jun 27, 2017
Lack of vocabulary and sentence structure
by: Anonymous

Hi. U need to work on sentence structure and avoid repetition of words like 'thing', 'very', 'many', 'purchase'.

Instead of that u can use synonyms. Try to use some complex and heavy words to make ur essay much effective.

Jun 27, 2017
how to improve?
by: Vishav

Hi,

Thanks for your feedback!

How to improve sentence structure and tenses?

Jun 29, 2017
How to improve
by: Anonymous

hi Visav. I also have the same problem about sentence structure and vocabulary. Now I start reading more and more English journals, columns and editorials, then try to find out the unknown words from dictionary. It takes time.

Jul 01, 2017
vocabulary
by: manpreet

Hello,

You have given good thoughts in your essay but need to add some heavy words. Start writing the vocabulary related to the common topics. For instance fashion, sci and tech, food, education.

Then fit the pertinent vocab accordingly... spend your time in reading the newspaper, specially editorial section. Good luck

Jul 06, 2017
feedback on Essay on the Impacts of Shopping
by: Anonymous

Please read the questions carefully like:

"Why is shopping so popular?"

You didn't explain this point.

"What are effects on society?" is not explained only eg. is given.

So elaborate more.

Jul 07, 2017
connectors?
by: u may call me chandu

You need to add some connectors which can show your opinion or idea's.

such as-

firstly, secondly, thirdly, furthermore, moreover, nevertheless, although, first of all and so on.

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Essay on Studying the Past at School

by Linh Trang
(Vietnam)

To some people studying the past has little value in the modern world.

Why do you think it is important to learn the past?

What will be the effect if children are not taught history?


Some people assume that the present is hardly getting involved in the history, so learning about the past is not important. In this essay, I am going to give several reasons for studying this subject along with some problems that could emerge if it is not taught at school.

In my opinion, there are two main reasons requiring us to know about history. First of all, when the young are reminded of majestic events in the past, their patriotism can be stimulated. For example, after searching information on history to preparing for a presentation at school, my sister now becomes more proud of her country. Moreover, commemorating the past through lessons enables children to gain a reservoir of knowledge and experiences.

If students are not educated in history, there will be some negative effects on themselves as well as the society. Without knowing history, the new generation may gradually become ungrateful and neglectful. Besides, the national security and defense will be put in jeopardy due to children lacking historic comprehension. Specifically, a recent magazine has indicated that a country can not survive without being loved by its people.

In conclusion, studying the past plays an important role in nations' existence, as a result, it is crucial for youngsters to learn it. I advocate that the government should take more measures to generalize history to the young in particular and the publicity in general.

***


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Family Communication Essay

by Simpi
(Gurgaon)

Nowadays we communicate less with our family members.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?


It is often argued that millennial generation is largely witnessing the shrinking communication among family members. This essay completely agrees with the statement and discusses how changing life style and enhancing indulgence into the virtual world are impacting the personal lives of young generation.

Firstly, the changing lifestyle owing to huge educational burden, intense competition, and 24/7 work commitments especially in developing countries has put a huge pressure on young generation leaving a little room for them to spend time with family members and enjoy on family occasions. One clear example is young generation specifically in developing countries majorly involve in projects at workplace that include co-ordination among people from different countries which often leads to largely working late nights owing to different time zones. The prevailing late night working culture creates a major time mismatch with other members in the family.

Secondly, the blurring line between real and virtual life such as easy access to social media, internet browsing, various applications and games on mobile itself engage youth and capture major chunk of the day. As per a survey conducted by American Youth Association, the millennial prefer to spend 80% of their idle time on internet and a meager 5% of their time with family.

To conclude, the changing life style and evolution of virtualization have completely disrupted the personal life of young generation. This has left little time for personal communication that nurture the relationships, hence witnessed the rising number of relationships going sour in modern society.

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Please can you give me feedback on my essay about family communication. Thanks.

Comments for Family Communication Essay

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Jan 15, 2017
Family communication Essay
by: Anonymous

I totally agree with you on both points in focus especially on indulgence into the virtual world.

Jan 15, 2017
Family communication
by: Anonymous

Simple and straight to the point

Feb 09, 2017
Feedback
by: Anonymous

I think your points are really great and you clearly organised it well, making your essay easy to follow. I think you just have some awkward phrases here and there but then again I didn't do too well in my writing part so don't trust me on this one.

I got the exact same question in my test! And I unfortunately didn't get the mark that I wanted.

I was curious, what mark did you receive?

Mar 14, 2017
Structure
by: Anonymous

introduction - Well paraphrased
Thesis - Clear
Outline - Clear
Topic sentence I - Well Supported
Topic sentence II - Well Supported
Conclusion - Main points summarized

comment-Good essay band 7.5

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